Law in Contemporary Society

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AustenBrandfordSecondPaper 4 - 19 Jul 2012 - Main.AustenBrandford
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The Truth About Role Models

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  He chose not to tell his children about this part of his life because he feared that it would stop us from seizing the opportunities that this country has to offer. He found upon moving to the US that a powerful way in which oppression operates is through the eyes of the oppressed, and he did what he could to minimize our inevitable exposure. He didn’t want us to feel like we had to lower the bar of accomplishment because we are black and miss out on all of the opportunities that he wished he had as a child in the Caribbean. He saw my law school admission as relative success and determined that I hadn’t so deeply internalized feelings of racial inferiority that I was derailed from pursuing my aspirations. For that reason, he was ready to tell me those stories.

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My dad and I had dinner a few months ago at a West Indian restaurant in the East Village. While discussing my future and “all of the doors that are open,” he told me that he was excited that I was on my way to a career that will be “fulfilling, fun, and something that [I’ve] always wanted to do.” I asked him if he felt like he found the career that he always wanted, and he hesitated. “I love being a doctor, but if I were in your shoes, I’d become a pilot.”

(I'd like to keep editing after receiving comments)

-- AustenBrandford - 21 Apr 2012

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The truth about role models is that their stories are often incomplete. Rarely is the path to fulfillment free of struggles, pitfalls, and failure. People are celebrated for their accomplishments while any mistakes or botched endeavors are glazed over like they never happened. While I understand my dad’s hiding of the whole family history, I’m very happy that he shared it. Upon learning what my predecessors faced, my respect and appreciation for who they eventually became increased immensely. Understanding my role models not as aspirations, but instead as humans shaped by both adverse and amazing experiences, made me even more willing to blaze and embrace my own path to a fulfilling and gratifying life, which is what he wanted for me from the start.
 
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So, what is the truth about role models? Your story contains many moving and fascinating elements. Your father's experience is a rich and powerful source of conscious and unconscious learning for you. His father's experience in turn shaped his life, consciously and unconsciously, in many conflicting ways.

Perhaps you kept your conclusions to yourself because you want these men to have their lives understood rather than interpreted. Or maybe your conclusions don't feel ready yet. But I think the most valuable way forward here is to ask the questions implicit in your title.

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My dad and I had dinner a few months ago at a West Indian restaurant in the East Village. While discussing my future and “all of the doors that are open,” he told me that he was excited that I was on my way to a career that will be “fulfilling, fun, and something that [I’ve] always wanted to do.” I asked him if he felt like he found the career that he always wanted, and he hesitated. “I love being a doctor, but if I were in your shoes, I’d become a pilot.”
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Revision 4r4 - 19 Jul 2012 - 01:20:38 - AustenBrandford
Revision 3r3 - 19 Jun 2012 - 15:45:41 - EbenMoglen
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